No Shoes Indoors: Leave your shoes at the door—our floors aren't a dance floor. Kitchen Use: Cook away, but no impromptu cooking shows, please. Pet Policy: Pets welcome, but no plans for world domination. Quiet Time: Keep noise to a library-level whisper. Trash: Dispose of it, but mysterious glowing items? Call us. Wi-Fi: Try the “Reboot Ritual” for issues before reaching out. Remote Control: Treat it like royalty and return it promptly. Bathroom Time: Keep showers under 15 minutes; no bathroom concerts. Napping: Nap anywhere, but no wake-up alarms needed. Emergencies: Dial 911 for real emergencies; text us for everything else.